original poetry by j v flaim
1992 - 1994
It's hard to separate the beginnings from the ends,
emotions overlapping, the straight parts from the bends.
Black is black and white is white,
but what divides the day from night?
What divorces wrong from right?
All things are not as they appear,
the lines between aren't always clear.
Decisions made, directions chosen,
based on circumstances frozen,
but nothing's still, all things are flowing,
always changing, never knowing.
Move ahead, take a chance, run the risk, dare to dance.
Don't let the world pass you by
just because you're afraid to try!
Who stole your smile girl?
Who took away your grin?
The girl I used to know must be buried deep within.
I wish I held the key that would open up your doors.
I wish I had the potion that would heal all your sores.
I don't have all the answers and I wont begin to guess.
It only makes me angry that I can't clear up this mess.
I think about you day and night.
You own my heart, control my plight.
What am I to do?
You've closed the door,
won't let me in.
Where am I to go?
I'll wait right here.
I'll know no fear.
It's you I need to hold.
I won't go away.
It's here that'll stay.
For you, I'll be so bold.
You can build a might castle
Sail the seven seas
Gather the finest treasures
Do one or all of these
You can pay your way from day to day and live without a care
But when love comes knocking at your door will you accept her dare
You'll gather your toys, see them as joys and think that you're happy for years
But then out ' the blue she'll walk up to you and kindle the doubts and the fears
You can close your mind, ignore the find, refuse to risk your past
But if this you do you'll never have a clue of true love, the one that lasts
So open the door, forget what has been
You'll want to know more, invite the lady in
Listen a while, feel what's deep inside
Relax your style, kick back, enjoy the ride
Who stole your smile girl?
Who took away your grin?
The girl I used to know must be buried deep within.
I wish I held the key that would open all your doors.
I wish I had the potion that would heal all your sores.
I don't have all the answers and I won't begin to guess.
It only makes me angry that I can't clear up this mess.
I think about you day and night.
You own my heart, control my plight.
What am I to do?
You've closed the door, won't let me in.
Where am I to go?
I'll wait right here.
I'll know no fear.
It's you I need to hold.
I won't go away.
It's here I'll stay.
For you, I'll be so bold.
Can you find joy in my good fortune, sorrow in my pain?
Can you laugh along with me when "fun" becomes my game?
When I get lost in life around me, will you call out my name?
Will you let me run wild and free and love me just the same?
I won't tell you how to live your life….
but I'll be there by your side….
to put my arms around you…..
when you feel you need to hide.
You'll be you and I'll be me.
We'll keep intact our identity
You and I, not we!
Come lay beside me darling
Place your head upon my chest
Let me put my arms around you
Relax and take a rest
Look up toward the heavens
Try to count the stars
Forget about your troubles
Time will heal the scars
Let me swim in the warm vibrations
Created by your touch
Let me drink of your glowing beauty
The beauty I long for so much
Help me forget about my problems
And feel the joy of you
Let us melt our minds together
And start our lives anew
Come lay beside me darling
Place your head upon my chest
Let me put my arms around you
Relax and take a rest
Hatred and anger
Misdirected Rage
Wasted Emotions
Close the book, don't just turn the page!
Focus your energies on things that create not destroy
Open your heart, start to love and feel the joy.
What's done is done, some things are over.
It's time to fly, not just hover.
Challenge yourself.
Put faith in who you are.
In a sky of black, you can be a shining star!
Life Throws Curves
You reached your hand inside of me
You touched my very heart
You pulled it back so carelessly
You tore my soul apart
With spark and fire to mark the start
A wall you set between
Where is that woman who made me whole
The one on me was keen?
The one you were you are not now
No wine to set you free
I jumped right in no fear at all
Ahead so recklessly
No time to share and get to know
No time to be just we
A heart so lock without a key
So very far from me
Cars go out as cars go in
Punching clocks, loading docks
Mindless work to pay the bills
Won't be long I'll have my fill
But many do this day by day
Endless cycle for average pay
Raise your hat to them I say
They're the ones that make our way
How we live we all enjoy
What they give creates our joy
What fills their hearts and drives their souls?
What makes them start and makes them whole?
Damn that hurts
My bell was rung
Tree hit head
My body slung
Thrown right down
From ladder high
Flat on the ground
My place to die?
Saw set free
To rest alone
Heavy wood
Broken bone
Shaken man
With bleeding head
Painful jaw
But be not dead
Thank the Lord
My sons OK
Now the shock
And pain come play
Not quite sure
Too fast it came
But here I am
Can't snuff the flame
Head and neck
The shoulder too
Scrapes and bruises
Yet sky is blue
On my feet
Damn that hurts
Yes it's broken
Yes death flirts
I'll fight so hard
Too much to give
Don't take me now
I want to live
So sweet the pain
That grounds me here
Keeps me home
With those so dear
It's not my turn
Hell I won't go
More love to share
This I know
I thank the Lord
For that pain
I welcomed it
It knew my name
Lock me in
Hang on tight
Life don't drain
So sweet the pain
Feed my soul with the throttle’s roll
Cut through the night
Carve through the turns
Embraced by wind
My body yearns
To feel you take me
Beyond just whole
Shake my soul
Set it free
Feel the rumble
Feel the heat
Deep inside you a fire burns
Drives your pistons
My stomach churns
Feed my soul with the throttle’s roll
Take me faster beyond my dreams
One with you and road it seems
Empty mind overflows my soul
Lean hard left then right and more
Wrapped in nature’s arms I glow
Through the dark of night we go
Alone with you
We ride again
Forget the day
Embrace the night
This moment’s real
This moment’s right
Feed my soul with the throttle’s roll
Full and fast
Not to last
Here today
Why not play
Soon to be
Less than me
Not so bold
Will be old
Breathe in deep
Get little sleep
Fly so high
All must die
Don't just wait
Increase your gait
Sing your song
Won't be long
Love full bore
You will soar
Don't regret
Place the bet
Go all in
Gold not tin
Roll the dice
Be so nice
Taste the wine
Why waste time
It's just age
Turn the page
Taste her lips
Rock her hips
Give of you
Sky so blue
Sun will rise
Don't tell lies
Say the words
Ask for thirds
Share your life
Take a wife
Raise a child
Free and wild
Take a chance
Laugh and dance
Run a mile
Make her smile
Start to live
Start to give
Share the love
Don't push or shove
Engage yourself
Be top shelf
Get on the edge
Do not hedge
Make the call
Take the fall
Be not scared
You will be paired
Weighing each word
Gauging each action
Imprisoned by your close minded reactions
I didn’t want to hurt you
So I hurt me
I lost sight of myself
I was no longer free
I was always on the job
No day off
No day off
I lost my sense of humor
The smile faded from my face
I had trouble keeping up with the never ending pace
Watching what I say
Watching what I do
I was no longer me
And I never wanted to be you
I’d forgotten what it was like to be free to take care of ME!
Typing words upon this page
A simple man and pleasant sage
Overstated it may be
But some have written
It's what they see
I have my moments of vented rage
Lock me up in my cage
Try to look beyond what's here
Come in closer won't be bitten
Share the vision without fear
Wisdom comes with more than age
It isn't years alone that gauge
Hear the words but listen too
Be quite sure be more than smitten
If be wrong you'll later rue
Cast no act upon this stage
Dance for joy and not for wage
Let the passion fill your soul
Playful like a little kitten
Be all real and play no role
cold and empty
is this house
sit here alone
keyboard and mouse
one more christmas
to come and go
one more year
no love to know
filled with hope
dreams unfulfilled
yet still believe
still strong of will
to settle not
for less than all
not to heed
an empty call
take in stride
what comes today
sincere in heart
that is my way
reckless love
unbridled trust
cast my net
for love and lust
hauled back empty
muscles sore
cast again
won't close the door
the day will come
when time is right
into my life
will shine bright light
cold and empty
is this house
but warm and open
shall be this heart
In Search of Love
Passion plays inside my head
Bring it home into my bed
Not to be just inside my mind
Where are you now?
How do I find?
How close some came
But played me fool
Whispered my name
My heart they ruled
So easy for me
I fall so hard
Yet still believe
Though heart’s been scarred
When will it stop?
The pain desist?
When come the pleasure?
Its rain persist?
Fall upon me and cleanse my soul
Engulf my body
Take your toll
Spin me shake me
Rock and roll
Move the earth
Make me whole
You are not far
The world’s small
Free my mind
Take me all
Come and find me
My way is lost
Come and get me
At any cost
Do not forsake me
In “no love’s” frost
Bring me warmth
My passion exhaust
Born again in your smile’s glow
Energized when you I know
Seed my heart and let love grow
Never again will I sink so low
Raise me up beyond my past
We’ll share our lust, lust that lasts
Show me love that is so vast
Our passions new and not surpassed
Beyond the clouds and distant stars
Our souls will travel for evermore
No longer bound by earth’s sad ways
Now a part of heaven’s praise
Bound in love and free to fly
Beyond all we know and call the sky
For now I do not know the way
Yet hope for you and daily pray
I do not know the how or why
But know you’ll be my total high
For now I’ll make it day by day
I’ll walk the path and will not stray
Hold out your hand and call to me
Guide me closer and bring me in
I’ll reach out too and shout to you
I want you now when will I win?
Touch my heart and touch my skin
Make love to me, cleanse my sin
Nothing matters where we’ve been
Today it starts, it all begins!
It's really not that complicated
Unless we make it so
The words inside won't go unstated
Me I'll let you know
Your soul itself will be ungated
The wine of love will flow
Passion's dance won't be debated
We'll fly so high not low
Spirits soar we'll be elated
Two to one we'll grow
You and I conjugated
Love me long and slow
Take my heart so long I've waited
Take me now don't go
Love me hard don't be sedated
Unto me bestow
Your gift of love clearly stated
Straight from Cupid's bow
Empty hope to fill my night
Bring you close and hold you tight
One day to be and be so right
They’ll be no guessing and be no fight
I wonder where you are right now
I search and search and search for tao
Won’t settle for less that is my vow
When will I find you when and how
To me surrender and give me all
I’ll give myself to you I’ll fall
I’ll hear your soul and answer its call
Perfect storm not just a squall
Beyond half way we’ll go all in
Blend together and love like sin
Lust and fire in passion’s spin
Our hearts and souls and minds will win
One journey ends and one begins
This one we’ll walk you’ll leave your yin
Forget the past and where you’ve been
We’ll walk together we’ll find our grins
Beyond the dark beyond the night
Beyond the lack of love and light
Into the glow that is so bright
Into the love that feels so right
Lets take the safe way out!
Why take a risk?
No reason to challenge ourselves.
Let's take the safe way out!
I'm so full of doubt.
Why should we love?
It only hurt us before.
Why should we care?
Show me the door.
Bring me in close.
Then I will run.
There are places to hide.
Love is a gun.
Why should we love?
Why take the risk?
Can't we be safe?
Hide from all this?
Why should we love?
What if it's me?
Is that who I am?
Afraid to be me?
Why should we love?
Can't we be free?
Alone to be?
Why are we drawn
like moths to a flame?
Why does this love
make me feel whole?
It will take me up high
and then take it's toll.
Why do we love?
Why do we care?
Why are we free?
Why do we dare?
You are so rare.
I can't walk away.
That's why I care.
I won't walk away.
No easy way out.
Not this time around.
I like who you are.
I love what I found.
I know why I love.
I know why I care.
I'll go out on that limb.
I'll take on the dare.
F@&% being safe.
I'll risk all I have.
Just give me that chance.
Together we'll dance.
There's an empty place
between my sheets
where you belong
Though I fill my day
sun up to set
alone again
Walk the beach
in sun's sweet warmth
yet cold inside
Glad to be
alive and free
but not complete
Roam this earth
a ghostly glide
when will I find
Curled up so close
so warm and fine
in just your thong
Your subtle curves
and silk soft skin
now draw me in
My love for you
your sweet caress
I'll never hide
To give you all
my very best
and not retreat
You set me free
yet own my all
my soul entwined
There's an empty place
here by my side
where you belong
This day to next
no end in sight
I wonder when
I hope and dream
sweet thoughts of you
my pain subsides
I keep my stride
maintain my pride
won't miss a beat
Fly like a dove
so high above
no hope confined
Head on my chest
you catch a rest
this can't be wrong
Lost in you now
so close to me
where have you been
Joined as one
unending high
sweet hearts now tied
All truth be told
transparent all
no deceit
Entangled two
joined as one
our bodies grind
There's an empty place
deep in my mind
where you belong
This barren room
no you to hold
I'm in a spin
Sweet time to come
surrender one
our souls collide
When will I find
the grail lost
one love elite
Come to me
one we'll be
our lives defined
It’s just me….
I’m no one’s super hero
But I’ll stand here by your side
I don’t care if the odds are against me
I’d rather fail than not have tried
I’ll stand my ground
And fight the fight
What’s deep inside
I know is right
I’m not afraid to work
I’ll shed a tear or sweat
Whatever it takes
That’s what you’ll get
I won’t run and hide
When you dive not glide
I won’t piss and moan
When you change your tone
It’s a coaster ride
Up and down
Hard right now then left and down
Up again through a loop
Banking left and another loop
You shake me up
I smile don’t frown
It’s an exciting ride
Since we left the ground
Come with me
Explore new heights
Cross that line
Feel my bites
Drink the nectar
Taste love’s wine
We won’t burn in hell
But we will feel fine
Through the nights
On you I’ll dine
Love your body
Touch your mind
Drink of me
Take me in
Passionate love
It is no sin
We’ll take to flight
Sensual delight
Each day anew
And too the night
Like swirling winds
Carrying the leaves
With autumns colors
Climactic lights
Trembling waves consume you now
You close your eyes and feel just WOW
Let me take you beyond this world
Over the edge your body hurled
Fall with me
No net below
Fall with me
Feel so free
Burn with me
Feel the glow
Take the step
Pass through that door
The one that keeps you from feeling more
Damn the past that holds your wrists
Damn the past and clench your fists
Come to me and touch the sky
Make love to me
We will fly!
One thing in life cannot be priced,
it's value goes beyond that the mind can see.
You cannot taste, touch, hear, or smell it,
but you can feel it in varying degrees.
You share it with friends and family,
it's fine, you feel secure,
But share it with someone you blend your mind with,
and for this, you'll find no cure.
In Love There's Hope
From my heart I speak to you
But your ears, heart, and soul fall deaf to me
Blocked by the noises of the world around you
A mind closed by past experience
All the same, is a mind closed
My soul bared to you
But you do not see
Cloudy vision
Shadows cast
Blinded by those things you think you need
Those things you choose to need
Those things you're told you need
Your soul is hungry and you choose not to feed it
Are you really happy
I saw your eyes
You showed me your soul
You left it slip out and this you do know
You pulled it back in
One time and then four
Now bound and gagged
It struggles on the floor
You can see its great pain
It longs to be free
It wants to soar high
Where it can see
What will it see
It just may see me
I think this you fear
What if it does and you want to get near
What if you love and have to risk all
What if you climb
What if you fall
What if you feel
What if you want
What if you love again
Will you get hurt
We all know the pain
We've all felt the rain
That isn't to say
We won't love again
What if this one
Is the one that is best
What if this one
Is not like the rest
What if you said
You changed your mind
Just not to risk all
And passed up this find
What if you walked
Never looked back
What will you feel
Not having tried
What if your soul
Told you the truth
What if your mind
Told you the lie
What if we dance
You give us a chance
What if we water
The seed that we know
What if it grows
And touches the sky
What if you smile
What if you fly
How would you feel
Never to know
My hand is held out
I will keep it right there
Hoping you reach
Hoping you share
Hoping you find
What lies deep inside
Hoping you'll trust
And walk by my side
The sun has risen and shown us a new path
It is with courage and trust that we walk forward
Only by embarking on the journey itself will we reveal the destination
May that destination be one of joy and sharing
Not knowing where the path will lead us
We set out with enthusiasm and vigor
We open our hearts and our minds to whatever will be brought our way
Doing anything less would compromise the beauty of it all
We love with blind faith and believe in destiny
We are not timid
We are not tentative in our actions
We believe in the moment and the power of nature to carry us to where we must be
We embrace the possibilities and do not cast the shadow of doubt upon them
We move forward without fear of the unknown and without regard for the past
For it is not the past that makes our future but our spirit and our desire
It is our very souls that drive the passions and the fire
I walk not alone into the dark as I seek a path to love
I know you are there beside me wherever I am
I may not know you yet nor you know me but I believe
Yes, I believe that I am not alone, that you are here by my side and ever will be
Etched so deep into my soul
Your story told without a word
Like shadows cast upon the snow
All can see but nothing’s heard
Words not spoken, clear as day
Yet still are true as love is pure
No actions taken for some time
Yet all these feelings still endure
Your eyes had fire
Your smile, light
Your heart sang loud
There was no night
A taste of pleasure’s wine so fine
A touch of heaven, a place divine
Denied this moment, denied this time
But will not die, will not decline
Burnt so deep into my soul
Your mark is made, the bounty paid
I can’t pretend that I’m not here
I cannot hide, I cannot fade
Your eyes had fire
Your smile, light
Your heart sang loud
There was no night
To the east the sun will rise
Pass above as time goes by
My mind will wonder to that place
You moved like light, you moved with grace
A moment shared between two friends
A quiet place without fanfare
No fancy trappings, nor pompousness
Just you and I in magic’s lair
Your eyes had fire
Your smile, light
Your heart sang loud
There was no night
There are those times in life when we feel that we have no love left to give
Those agonizing moments when we realize that all we can we've given
They have taken all, still wanting more, yet never gave one bit
They were here for fun but now have run and left us, they just quit
There is pain in that one moment that lives with us for days
We think that it has changed us and has stripped us of our ways
But deep inside we've love to give, more than they will know
For it is that love that we all know grows more and more and more
A gift to give that multiplies when given without condition
Comes from your heart and from your soul yet never empties either
We hurt at times and feel its loss but deep inside its there
It can't be used or taken away for those who love and dare
It grows and grows exponentially when the one you love is fair
When that one is who they are with or without you there
They'll give back to you more than you've dreamed without a pause or thought
What's deep inside will be free and you'll love without compare
Up 'til now you've thought you've loved and given of your soul
Yet soon you'll find beyond your mind a place you didn't go
That place you'll find will bring you to a love beyond control
All the things that make you feel you'll feel now and know
Tranquility, a resting place, arrived and not too soon
You'll settle in, take off your shoes, kick back, sleep 'til noon
No pressure here, no wondering "if", you'll know its real now
You'll have all the love you'll need to give and get more than you've dreamed
Believe…..I do!
Your temple tall and slender build adorned with leather and lace
You drew me in you caught my eye and took me from this place
Beyond the moment's lustful thoughts beyond the sparkle and shine
Your inner beauty revealed to me as pure as finest wine
To look inside and see what's deep beneath the surface show
To touch your soul and meet your mind and all to get to know
Far down the paths we've traveled on long down these roads alone
Parallel and never crossed side by side unknown
To come as one yet different be you are you and I am me
Past is past accepting that a future might bring we
Cut through the night and darkness black and bring us t'ward the light
Unchain our minds unleash our souls a radiant love so bright
Yes all of this I do believe to me you'll come one day
You'll take my hand you'll know my soul as one we'll walk away
Which way is up?
I've been tumbled around
Pondered so many things
Will my feet find the ground?
Bright lights flashing
What is that sound?
A freight train coming
Head starts to pound
What to do next?
I'm on top of the mound
Or will I go under?
Soon to be drowned
Ruling the world
Like I've been crowned
Or will they arrest me?
Shackled and bound
I've been on the bottom
But all things come round
I'll be on the top
I'll be the one found
I've chased after love
Like the tireless hound
Spun like a top
A spring over-wound
I've cried out in pain
That horrible sound
I've sung words of joy
Love's lyrics abound
Like a star from the sky
An angel's been downed
Protected by friends
Their love will surround
Fight off despair
The devil confound
Taste the sweet air
The faithless astound
Bounce like a ball
To the heavens rebound
Passion and fire
Emotions unbound
Hold up your head
Your doubts are unsound
You'll get where you're going
You'll not run aground
I believe in you my friend!
Odds and Ends
Family and friends collected together
Some journeyed quite far despite the cold weather
T'is the season to gather and share in the gifts
The love that surrounds us bringing great bliss
We laugh and we smile as we share in a meal
Prepared by an elder with passion and zeal
Cookies were baked with such love and such care
Finding the time yet none seemed be there
We carried the gifts we searched for so hard
To give of ourselves to those we regard
Spreading the joy selfless and free
This blessing is great don't you agree
T'is CHRISTmas my friend
Our proud culture defend
Open your eyes and tear down the pall
Shout it loud don't muffle your call
"Merry CHRISTmas to One and Merry CHRISTmas to All"
Cold, damp air and a cutting breeze
Full moon rising on uneasy seas
Cloud covered sky with hidden stars
Waves breaking high, the ocean's scars
A lonely night on and isle of steel
A tired old sailor awaiting his meal
Staring out into the blackness, his mind's sailing all the seas that he has known
He relives the trials and tribulations that have blessed him with many tales to call his own
Age is rolling in like the morning's fog
Time is running out for this salty dog
A wealth of knowledge he has to show
Gathered from wherever the salty winds blow
A life so full he has led
But a lonely man lies at night in his bed
The sea for a wife, adventure for sure
The emptiness in his heart her waves cannot cure
To hunt for a maiden, he was afraid
Now in the cold sea, his body be laid
This story ends with a simple moral
There is more to this life than gathering up coral
True happiness comes when you find the right girl
our paths had crossed many times
as we walked about in circles
a smile offered
the word hello
perhaps a simple greeting
time slowed down
as we walked around
how blessed was I to share your path
an angel for my meeting
from an unseen seed
friendship rose
we shared our thoughts
we talked our talks
you helped me grow
unfinished work still in progress
n’er did I wonder
how this would flow
nor did I think the friends we’d be
things we’d shared as deep as sea
the gift you give me
has not price but value beyond compare
a friendship like ours
not often is found
a beautiful thing
quite rare
Another day is nearly gone
T'was very full but is not quite done
I rose from bed and began the race
Showered and shaved with little grace
Fueled my body with my standard fare
Oatmeal and fruit not at all rare
Logged on here as I clothed the frame
Nothing flashy dressed quite tame
Off to work down the interstate
Driving fast my normal rate
All the way in a state of rem
Got to work at 8 am
I need a change from this day to day
Soon they'll be another way
Lunch was fine
I cannot whine
The bill this time
On a vendor's dime
Afternoon came and went
No ruffled feathers not even a dent
Out the door and into the car
Stopped at Starbucks don..t do the bar
Kickin' coffee and pumpkin bred
Typed a bit while I fed
Had to pass on the gym today
Got chores to do no time for play
Cruising home all alone
Used the time to do the phone
Wash was soaking three days now
Finally in the dryer WOW
Another load cycle start
Doing laundry is no art
This warm night a December gift
I can hang the lights if I be swift
Front now lit twinkle twinkle
One load folded not a wrinkle
Load two tumbles round and round
That damn dryer has a rumble sound
It's now a bit past ten
Need some sleep but who knows when
I'll be up at half past four
I have to wait to fold some more
I fill the time by typing this
A change of pace from my normal hiss
Background tunes by Allison Krauss
I tap the keys and click the mouse
Finally ate if you can call it a meal
A late night banana worked ideal
Dryer stopped time to fold
This silly poem is getting old
I guess it time to write the end
Good night to all sleep well my friend....
it snuck up behind me
without any warning
was distracted by life
enjoying my morning
caught up in all I had to do
is this a head cold that got me
or is it some flu?
what the hell is that stuff
jammed in my sinus?
i can’t even think now
can’t add, subtract, multiply, or minus
weather has changed
and the leaves they are falling
summer’s estranged
the cold nights are calling
turn up the heat
and put on the flannels
this is not sweet
can you change the damn channel?
damn head cold!
Yank the cord hard and yank it again
Sputter and spit yank number ten
Come to life and let out a roar
Spinning fast chain wood chips will soar
It wasn't mine to do as I pleased
But this was the day the moment I seized
I fired that saw and moved right on in
Hacking away with my sick little grin
A long time in coming the fall of your limbs
This wasn't just a feeble old whim
Halfway through I dialed my phone
"That hedge of yours now cut to the bone"
That unsightly old growth twelve foot or more
Heaped in a pile one can't ignore
Blocking one's view year after year
We bitched and we whined no one to hear
Look down the street now your view it is clear
The neighbors all happy not one little sneer
Sometimes we wait and we wait way to long
Finally I moved and now sing a song
It feels damn good to have cleared up that mess
But I'm not done yet, the house will be next.
How can I describe being at peace with myself?
A difficult task, no doubt!
Picture yourself as a high diver, but with a twist. The challenge is to perform your best possible dive, but you are doing so blindfolded.
Each day, each challenge, each relationship you make the leap blindfolded, not knowing how far down the water is, how deep the water is, or, for that matter, if there is even water at all.
Each dive may be your last!
But you remain focused on being the best you can be at the moment, never thinking about what may come or reflecting on what has passed, just being your best in the NOW!
Painting with Words
I sat beside and angel on a cushion made of rock,
an island in the river, a place to sit and talk.
I lost myself inside those eyes,
pools of truth, no room for lies.
I lost myself inside that soul,
that heavenly body, how could I know?
I found myself inside those eyes,
no time for games, no time for lies.
I found myself inside that soul,
inside my heart, her bell toll.
Ring true, ring loud, that sweet, sweet sound
bouncing off the mountains 'round.
Ring true, ring loud, that sweet, sweet sound,
on that rock, an angel found!
Dance for me………like the candle's flame………
Make me want you………call out my name…….
Smooth as silk…..your golden skin……
Lay with me……take me in……
Touch my body……up and down…..
Taste me, smell me……no more to frown…..
In my head…..you share my space……
In my bed…..our hearts do race……
You have my mind…..and touched my soul…..
Take my body…..and you I'll know…..
Take my body…..it's all that's left……
Take my body……you have the rest !
Major Stress…..
Emotions out of control
From a graceful glide
To a reckless roll
Maintain…….
'Got to strap down my brain
Lights are flashin' inside my head
At the slightest threat, I see red
Slow down, back off
Sit down, cool off
One step at a time
You'll get it back on line
Take a long, deep breath and
RELAX……….
A table and four chairs
Three empty
My lap top and thoughts of you
Wherever you may be
My chicken soup and veggie sandwich gone
I sip my water and tap a few more keys
Where are you now I wonder?
I relax a bit and ease up
Forget the rigid discipline
Today I treat myself
Enjoy
A pecan braid pastry and a large cup of decaf
Ahhhhh......now that's good
It feels like home here now
Behind the counter they all smile
Do they know?
I have no better place to go
My anonymous family and friends
Another sip of water
Cutting my pastry with my Swiss army knife
I am a simple man
Now a taste of sweet pleasure
A warming sip of coffee
To me a gift as fine as treasure
There is beauty in the moment
I am thankful
There is wisdom in the knowing
The chairs are not empty
You are here with me
I am not alone
It seems that sometimes I move way too fast
I run with the feelings like the day is my last
I live life with passion and radiant fire
Not afraid to verbalize all my desires
I open my heart and pour out my soul
I worry not a bit whatever the toll
Come to me now and come in quite close
I'll give all my love not just one dose
Abandon your caution and walk there with me
Release all emotion and set your soul free
Unlock those desires that dwell in your heart
Let's take that first step the fire we'll start
Your eyes draw me in so deep and so dark
You ignited a flame not just a spark
Time is so precious and ours seems so short
I want to be with you and will not comport
Come to me now and open your arms
Flirt with me tease me turn on your charms
Fill up my heart and drive my desires
Lets get together and feel love's fires
Wrapped in your love
Your warm embrace
Your body clad
In leather and lace
Your sweet perfume
Casts its spell
You own me now
Feel me swell
Against your body
My fiery touch
Ignite the fire
Inflame the lust
Touch my skin
Take me in
Let me feel you
Lost in sin
Rock your hips
And arch your back
Feel the pleasure
And give it back
Share with me
What's deep inside
Let it out
Do not hide
Straddle me now
Our bodies grind
That magic spot
We can find
Beyond delight
Pure pleasure too
I want to taste
Your lover's dew
Passion's wine
Lose track of time
Through the night
To morning's light
Taste me now
And make me new
This day just one
But more to come
We'll share again
And again
And again
And again
through nature’s hallways
lined with trees
winding pathways
my soul she frees
my mind she empties
of stress and pain
she feeds my body
I live again
no great cathedrals
bring me so close
to my God
His gifts
my host
her rays of sunshine
her winds so cold
driving hail
the snows she blows
raging waters
glass like lakes
wild tremors
when earth she quakes
no great cathedrals
bring me so close
to my God
His gifts
my host
i’ll climb her mountains
caress her waist
embrace her contours
seek out her grace
taste her passions
bestowed on me
these her treasure
yet all are free
no great cathedrals
bring me so close
to my God
His gifts
my host
hide not inside
those man made walls
that jail us
block out her calls
step beyond
the doors kept closed
worship Him
through her exposed
no great cathedrals
bring me so close
to my God
His gifts
my host
hike her trails
run her paths
brave her winters
taste her wrath
paddle her rivers
scale her rocks
soak up her rays
leave your box
no great cathedrals
bring me so close
to my God
His gifts
my host
experience nature!
The City
Tall buildings hide the sun
People rushing, the day is done
Endless lines of plastic and metal
Bumper to bumper, gas and brake pedal
Beneath the piles of concrete and steel
Mother Earth's heartbeat is muffled, but real
Her children have lost sight of what is important
Their natural goodness lies sleeping, now dormant
Safety in numbers, that's what they thought
A world of fear is now what they've got
The change was not sudden
It didn't come without warning
It wasn't just there when they got up one morning
Upside down now, their world is turning
Now into their cars they rush when they can
Out of the cities, in search of "true man"
Onto the highways, rails, or flyways
Out of the cities, that's the great plan
They long for the mountains, the rivers, the trees
Driven by feelings that weaken their knees
Mother Earth's heartbeat again will grow strong
If nature's allowed to sing out her song
Steel and glass, rising, rising, upward in mass
Out of the concrete covered ground
Into the ski, the sky, so full of the city's sound
Architectural marvels, monuments to man's survival
A vision seen, a challenge taken
Rising up from a land forsaken
Erector sets on a grand, grand scale
Connected by blacktop ribbons and steel rails
Ever growing, never slowing
The beat of the city persists
The sounds of her drums creating a rhythm
That many of cannot resist.
On the platform, cold winds blow
People wait, train's runnin' late
No one talks
Eyes stay fixed, looking at no one
Train pulls in, doors roll open
Silence prevails as people board
They sit by themselves, empty seats protecting their space
Still saying nothing, eyes open, but seeing nothing
Programmed by the city
A lack of feelings, what a pity
Ten minutes go by without a word
I steal a glance at the girl across the aisle
But I'm caught up in the apathy around me
Twenty minutes have gone by now, I want to say hello
I want to bring the humanity back
The good feelings that I know
So what the hell, I change my seat and offer her my card
"Hi, I'm from out of state, I don't need a date, I just want to say hello"
She was startled at first but she smiled a smile that said "hello"
We talked for while, each other we got to know
"Final Stop, Penn Station"
The door rolled open and we walked to the street
(she didn't know her way)
I hailed a cab and opened the door
She began to walk away
"Hey, where are you going? This is for you, good bye and enjoy your day"
I closed the door and smiled
I made a friend today
This is the way it should be
You know the best things in life are free
Words for Others
I love you more than you understand
Yet love you not enough
You’re far beyond all that I’ve had
How do I tell you what I must
I want you close with no rebuff
To stand by me and share our lust
Express myself and take you in
I need you near for now and then
Yet deep I know you’re not the one
That will fulfill me moon and sun
Yet more than any you get me close
You are my island of sheer repose
To drink the wine of you divine
But hide the load I carry
Am I cruel and cold to you
The one I will not marry
My heart it swells with love for you
Yet there’s more I know to feed me
You give so much each day we share
The truth I guard and do not dare
If this burden be taken from me
What happiness be there
To know that in my own completion
I lost the you I care
So bitter sweet is our love
Both ways I want it cannot be
Doomed by fate
Doomed by me
pure and simple
love and passion
who did god see
when her he fashioned
i searched the night
‘til morning light
far and wide
where did she hide
spirit tired
where lay to rest
then all at once
she came the best
drawn to you
my life’s desire
drawn to you
by passion’s fire
my soul’s delight
quench my thirst
my spirit’s mate
come seal our fate
in distant lands
we sleep at night
but side by side
our love shines bright
now test the waters
break new ground
let not others
smother our sound
let down your shroud
accept our love
sing out sing loud
sing clear sing proud
The Grail Search
Who are you pretty woman?
The one that caught my eye
Will you touch my heart?
Can you make me sigh?
Are you the one I seek?
Are you really there?
Have you looked inside yourself?
Have you taken on the dare?
Are you an empty shell?
Painted pretty?
Acting well?
Or are you the real thing?
True to life?
Could be a wife?
Worthy of ring?
Look deep inside yourself
What do you see?
Who is that looking out at me?
If you do not know you
How can you know me?
If you do not love you
You can never love me
Reach deep inside yourself
Set your soul free
Let your spirit fly
Be all that you can be
Trust in who you are
Forget about the scars
Move toward those stars
Believe in you
Believe in me
Let the days unfold
You be you
And I’ll be me
Between us
Truth so bold
Each ourselves together one
Unique apart yet entwined in fun
Side by side or each alone
Love so strong it could be stone
You for me and me for you
This the life that is long past due
I sit and wonder when I’ll find you
It’s been quite a while since I noticed your smile
But I held myself at arms length
Sending a hello from time to time
Yet holding more back than I sent
Hoping for more but not risking much
After all I am safe in my world
But closing my eyes I see that warm place
Together with you I am curled
It’s time I reached out and screamed what I want
How else will you know that I’m real?
I’m more than my page, that collection of font
Touch me, embrace me, know that I feel
You read all my words as I send them to you
You’ve sent some back though they are few
You haven’t denied me nor blocked me quite yet
I can only suspect that you like that we’ve met
Open the door and let me come in
Smile that smile and I’ll know you within
Whisper the words that I am longing to hear
Dance through the night lay aside your fear
Feel me touch you, body and soul
Pull you toward me, hold you so close
Open yourself to me and let me come in
Comfort and sooth me, let us begin
Damn the passion
Damn the fire
Damn the love
And damn the desire
Damn those things that make us whole
Damn those things deep in our souls
Why risk love and pay the price?
Why reach out and be so nice?
Some things now past have cast dark shadows
Scarred your heart and broke cupid's arrows
Behind those eyes the warmth of summer
Trapped in ice you've become a runner
It's not your style to close the doors
Your heart cries out it wants some more
Plucked from the pot like a dead flower
Where is the love that I need this hour?
The empty spot I would not know
But you rushed to me and made me grow
Don't take away the joys we share
Give life to love don't pluck it bare
Take a chance on love's sweet dare
Feel the warmth and know I care
i rise to the occasion
always ready for my day
jump into my morning
my chores to be my prey
but if you were here beside me
i'd stay a while and play
why leave the warmth and comfort
provided by your ray
to leave my bed without you
to simply walk away
would hide what i am wanting
more than i can say
so wrap yourself around me
i'll smell your sweet bouquet
take me deep inside you
hear me and obey
soar with me beyond this place
our passionate array
our chariot of fire and light
lustful and risqué
a journey made of pure delight
may it never be passé
i want this now
and every day
those chores will wait i'm sure
if i could
yes i wood
between the sheets I should be resting
lost in sleep from this day's testing
no good reason to be here writing
something's burning the flame igniting
to lay in bed now I would be turning
restless movements my body yearning
spoon with me our bodies nesting
love's waves rising her tide is cresting
until the dawn my soul will travel
near to you our bodies ravel
not here inside myself am I
but laying with you right by your side
time and distance are not constraints
love and passion a canvass paints
no limit to what can come true
believe in love and nature too
ever lasting never ending
gentle kisses this night I'm sending
stay with me a while longer
fill my dreams and make love stronger
A Day in the Life
No whimpering or whining
Just did what I had to do
Didn't worry about tomorrow
Today was all I knew
Got up each and every morning
Handled the tasks at hand
Played the cards that came my way
Not always what I planned
Scratched and clawed to rise above
To take on all I could
Beat the odds to be a mom
Most thought I never should
The path I walked brought me here
I've passed life's hard exam
Raised my boys to be fine men
Proud and strong I am
Can't always pick the ripest fruits
Nor reap the grain we choose
But rise to the occasion
You'll win and never lose
Push yourself beyond your thoughts
Reach well beyond your brain
Challenge the world's assumptions
You'll be surprised at what you attain
Chase your heart wherever it leads
No doubts to rein you in
Ride the clouds far and free
It's where you're going not where you've been!
I won't fill your page with comments
Compete with all those folks
I won't send you pasted pleasures
Nor other people's jokes
My words to you will be to you
From deep within my heart
When I write to you it will be me
Not sculpted words as art
My friends and readers in this place
Will read my words and thoughts
But with you I'll share my inner self
My heart, all chains unlocked
We live our lives in many ways
Filled with friends a plenty
Though one will be the one for me
Not five, not ten, not many
I know you're there and I am here
One day our paths will cross
You'll understand just who I am
Together we'll get lost
Not jealous words nor insecure thoughts
Just faith in me and you
Knowing you are with me
Knowing I am with you
Here I sit and here I wait
No rush to find this treasure
All things in time no race to fate
No clock for love's pure pleasure
Each day unfolds into the next
Yet mysteries to us all
Life goes on, I type my text
One day I hope I'll fall
Take with you what you will
From the words upon these pages
To me one thing to you another
But here for all the ages
Fill out the form
Make check payable to Vital Records
Thank you
It will take five minutes
Excuse me sir
Have you ever used another name?
No M’am
Always been who I am
No records found
Had a brother before me with the same name
Gee that’s odd
He only made it a few days
Let me check again
Sorry you’re not here
Can you return in two hours?
This will take some time I fear
Will have to check New Castle
No problem
I’ll disappear
Guess I already have
Two hours to kill
Newspapers in the lobby
Machine is empty
Sold its fill
Snack bar below
May as well go there
Simple affair
No plan hatched this
Just squeezed it in
Checked it off the list
Watch them come and watch them go
All kinds here
Near empty room
Many chairs
Yet he contemplates
Do I sit there or there or there or there?
Simple question
Yet much fanfare
Long tight dress on dark brown skin
Tells me more than I need to know
Simple girl with dark brown slacks
Cordial greeting then ate so fast
Big grey man with bag of chips
Sips a coke
Not too fit
That long tight dress walks out the door
Shake my head
Show no more
Green golf shirt
Drink in hand
Looks at news from across the land
Lime green sweater
Tight black slacks
Ahhhhhhh
Where was I
Yes
Tight black slacks
Out the door
She never looked back
Thin and balding
Hair askew
Faded shorts and backpack too
Three old women collect their lunch
Many come and many go
Biker type with two-way radio
Grabs a salad and out the door
The blind cashier walks to the hall
Cane in hand
Past blue shirt and tall
Looks book-smart
The kind you see on TV
Cast as a professor or preacher
Yet I wonder who he is
So many different lives pass by
So different
Yet all here
Paths that cross every day
Punch the clock and share these halls
Pushing papers
Handling calls
Many people within these walls
Filing cabinets
Desks and chairs
Monitor screens
Keyboards many
Hardware
Software
Here at Health and Welfare
But they lost me somewhere
An hour passed now since
No Record Found
Short thin man with wooden cane
State police cap and matching shirt
His son or daughter on the force
A father’s pride in child’s course
Wide print tie over dark blue shirt
Lose the comb-over and you’ll look sharp
1980 but sharp
Bleached blonde hair and makeup thick
Be who you are
Try that trick
But who am I
No Record Found
Attitude
I read that once
Not window dressings or high test scores
Not daddy’s money or being funny
Attitude is the key
Believe in you
Believe in me
Take the tools that you have
Bite down hard and make the move
Follow your heart
Be who you are
Who am I?
No Record Found
But I have attitude
I’ll go far
Fall down once
One more scar
Brush myself off
Reach for a star
Three steps forward
One step back
Success is a process
Not a place on a map
Life is a journey
But to where
Must there be a place
Do we really care?
Hmmmmm
Success is a process
Life is a journey
A journey is a process
Is life success
How do I live it?
True to myself
Follow my heart
Go where it takes me
It takes me to YOU
Love is a journey
Love is a process
Love is OUR life
Love is success
But who am I
No Record Found
busy my soul
raise the goal
make me reach
but do not preach
motivate me
you have the key
reach far inside
don’t let me slide
I want to learn
my brain cells churn
beyond this place
my presence grace
raise me up
fill my cup
quench my thirst
not last but first
share your mind
future defined
no clear path
but tools like math
pave the way
sometimes gray
english too
another glue
put me together
tough like leather
perhaps some science
a strong alliance
take on the world
into her hurled
physically fit
with mental grit
prepared for life
a sharpened knife
I’ll rise above
but I need your shove
don’t take it easy
don’t be queasy
push me hard
be on your guard
form me
shape me
guide me
make me
I will succeed
but you I need
Caregivers
dad comes and goes
though he is always here
semi sleeps and deep sleeps
take him far yet keep him near
hold on to the moments
though some may seem so hard
memories fade over time
the bad days won’t be clear
you’ll smile a smile that fills your soul
and makes your heart sing loud
you’ll remember all the good days
forever hold them dear
no burden be so heavy
no challenge be so great
the Lord is walking with us
He sets our humble gait
be all that you can be
fret not about the day
keep a smile upon your face
the love will be your pay
no treasure on this simple earth
to this can one compare
the pleasure found inside yourself
as you become aware
there’s more to you than just your day
more to life than taking
open up and spend yourself
stretch your arms awakening
love the ones so dear to you
as life itself declines
do not back off or run away
the time may be divine
the time may be divine
he sat there at the kitchen table
quiet as can be
his stare was distant
his body still
his eyes they spoke to me
what are you thinking pop
the words I said to him
followed by my jest
dancing girls and wild parties
a wild life of sin
his words were simple
clearly spoke
rolled off silky
though past years stroke
he smiled a bit as he said “my wife”
no jokes this time
came from me
no distractions offered
in his heart such beauty
his love was health renewed
though he’s weak now mom is too
though their lives now fade
I may be younger
stronger too
their love has made the grade
there’s much to learn
their old school ways
in spite of clashing nays
they stand the test of time
such enduring love I praise
and in these fading moments
such lessons I can learn
Lord give me wisdom that I can see
beyond myself beyond just me
give me love their way
to take care of you and you and you
i have to take care of me
to lose sight of that fact
would bring upon us one harsh reality
at times the best thing that i can do for you
is to step back
take a breath
and remember me
to give to you and love you
i cannot completely neglect me
these are not my selfish words
but a recognition of what must be
a delicate balance of things it is
too much one side
too little there
out of kilter then comes despair
i’ll maintain myself
intact and strong
take care or me
and i won’t go wrong
keep my strength and fill my heart
with the love that fires start
you’ll feel the warmth within my soul
and i’ll give to you so all may know
shine long and bright
maintain my light
i’ll be a beacon in the dark of night
i won’t give up and lose this fight
we’ll enjoy days left to us
sharing moments true
pure of heart a living art
our skies be ever blue
12/22/09
not for thy self but for those we love and cherish.....in letting go of the me, I shall grow....in growing I shall find greater peace.....in peace I shall be one with the world......
01/15/10
like a candle flame in the wind.....we flicker....struggling to stand up to the winds of age.....the fight is noble....but fruitless nonetheless.....the best we can hope for is to hold on to our dignity as life slips away........we all deserve at least that......
06/27/10 9:52 am
though your flame flickers in the breezes of the coming storm.....and soon your dance will be no more......rest assured loving mother that your light will live on in your children and your children’s children for all eternity.....and in that light we will spread the love you shared with so many.....never to be forgotten.....never to be forgotten.....Amen.
2/14/13
dearest father….
true to himself
the tallest man I’ve ever known
never wavering from his path
beneath his wings we have grown
he served his family and his country
faithful to the Lord
taught us all that he could
with loving heart and oft stern word
he got things done without complaint
self sacrifice he knew
played the cards dealt his way
his outlook never blue
to many others he’d lend his hand
freely giving what he can
regardless what the day would bring
he’d smile a smile that could almost sing
with loving wife he raised us all
by her side and standing tall
we’ve each and all had our bouts
but undying love there is no doubt
to watch a man so great as he
was such a gift for all to see
now lay your head in well earned rest
dearest father you were the best
lay with mom at your side
love of your life and source of pride
bless us all from above
as you share in Our Father’s love
father may your soul and all the souls of the faithfully departed
rest in peace.
amen
“Socialism in general has a record of failure so blatant that only an intellectual could ignore or evade it.”
Thomas Sowell
